Know the Secrets of Master Influencers to Get What You Want (Part 2)
In part 1 of our series, I spoke about the importance of setting goals and two secrets that master influencers use to get what they want. For your convenience, the 1st secret was "Complain to win, not to feel worse", and the 2nd secret was "Figure out what others want."
I know you want to know more about the secrets of master influencers. So, let’s jump in…
Be persistent in a gentle way...
Most of us learn through life experiences that not every desire is satisfied right away. But, as every salesman knows, receiving 10 or even 100 rejections doesn’t mean you need to give up. Instead, try a new approach and be gentle in your approach.
Commanding someone to change or provide something to you violates the law of psychological reactance: "No one likes to be told what to do". According to Michael Pantalon, Ph.D., and author of "Instant Influence: How to Get Anyone to Do Anything-Fast", “if you genuinely say to someone, ‘You don’t have to do that, it’s your choice,’ their resistance melts away and they start thinking about their own thought processes, instead of yours.”
So, if your front door is closed, try the window, the back door or the garage— all in a gentle way. Lee Iacocca, the former President of Ford and Chairman of Chrysler explains, “you’ve got to say, ‘I think that if I keep working at this and want it badly enough I can have it.’
Make your gain their gain...
The days of helping for the sake of helping are out of the window—I feel bad mentioning this, but I can’t but avoid this truth. I’m sure you have figured this out in your own life; the ‘what’s in it for me’ attitude is becoming a cultural norm.
So, my friend, don’t get hurt! Embrace the truth when asking someone for help, be it your boss, co-worker or friend.
Learn the mastery to make your victory their victory—well, at least seemingly. Make them convinced. If you gain something, how does it help them? Maybe a lighter workload, maybe a chance of accelerated promotion; things like that. Consider the other person’s gain and utilize those benefits as one of your selling points.
If your achievement affects them positively, they’ll be happier than ever to help you, more than ever. And guess what? You'll get what you want.
Five buzzwords of persuasion to keep in mind...
Professor Emeritus of Psychology at Arizona State University and one of my favorite mentors Robert Cialdini identifies five effective & exploitable buzzwords that can be made use of depending on which side of the persuasion equation you are on.
• Social Validation
When you're enjoying a free wine tasting or the free scone at the coffee shop you might be thinking that you are coming out on top. But I'm afraid my friend that this is not the case. The expectation to give something back is a strong human instinct that leads us to purchase something.
Now, come to the second buzzword. People are tempted to do something if they see some other people have done it. Yes, the mentality of the herd is alive in all of us.
Third buzzword. If you like someone, you will say yes to almost all of their requests. If he/she is attractive or compliments you well, that works, too.
The fourth buzzword. Just recall how dentists sell a particular brand of toothpaste. Yes, you got it. It’s the reassuring gloss of authority.
Final buzzword. If you grab a simple "overpriced" t-shirt from a sales person who tells you this is only available for today and it’s the last piece, only then you do you feel how persuasive these "limited-time" & "limited-quantity" offers are!
A word of caution: utilize these classic buzzwords judiciously and be aware of those who might apply them to you.
So, what’s next after identifying the secrets of master influencers to get what you want? The answer is simple. Keep following my blog because I will come up with more flawless methods & techniques, so that you can get what you want.