Where did this concept or syndrome of “caring for others” come from? We as women are perfectly programmed since early age to be caregivers, caretakers, nurturing everybody who is in our lives. I know that very well. I was working with children as a kindergarten teacher and day care provider for 25 years. I have a husband and 3 children on my own. That is all norm you might say. But just recently I realized that taking orders and looking after everybody, there is little space, time, no strength to look at myself and often not even having an idea, what I really wanted.
Be yourself! Who am I?
This is something we have heard numerous times throughout our lives but I don’t think we realize, what it truly means or perhaps the value it has. There was very little space for myself in the grand picture of things and even if there was, it would be somewhat of a hindrance to those around me who were programmed to give orders. Nobody actually had to place orders. It was done automatically by us being a daughter, mother, wife, employee. Don’t you agree?
Where am I now?
It is time to see the manipulation, wonder and amazement, when our pleasing manners are cooling down. When I look at me and begin acknowledging my feelings, then maybe I can get the best piece of the cake instead of the last one or none. Do I always have to jump, when somebody makes a request? Do I need to say yes, if I don’t mean it? Do I always have to earn and prove to others I am worthy of love? It is me who loves me, me who approves of me, me who gives permission to be lazy and do absolutely nothing or read a book without feeling guilty.
It takes time, courage and awareness to realize that the old patterns of codependency create hostage rather respected partners. It never works. Do you have what it takes to ask for what YOU need and want?
I am no longer actively involved with children, I am saving my energy for my wonderful grandchildren. There are many roads to independence, self realization, self approval. I am learning new skills, acquiring new knowledge, meeting new people. If you want to find out, how I did it, have a look bellow and by clicking the button you open the door to the new world. It is now up to you, if you go through. Doesn’t cost you anything to try and see. Have a peek.