You Don't Have to Have it All

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Bring home the bacon and cook it too!

In the 1980’s women were encouraged to “Have it All”  Yes, the slogan was that you could bring home the bacon and cook it too. Today for some reason, I was thinking of Helen Gurley-Brown author of “Having it All” and editor of Cosmopolitan Magazine for over 30 years.    

Helen and her book was the inspiration or force behind this movement for women to have it all; a career, home, family, husband. Essentially, she created super moms. Working a full time job, managing the household, raising children and being the ideal wife is what all women were inspired to be.

The pressure was on, and pressure it was. It was a time of perfect hair, perfect make-up and being your best 24/7. One needed excellent time management skills, more hours in the day than was physically possible, and it was exhausting! If something didn’t get done, the level of guilt, anxiety, stress, and sense of failure was high.    

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It was a juggling act!

It was a juggling act, without question. It was only a matter of time before life started unraveling at the seams; it was not a sustainable way of life. I know because I did it, or attempted to do for years before exhaustion took over. Then one day I asked myself “why”? Why was it necessary? Was it humanly possible to be perfect 24/7, and be all things to all those around you, your boss, co-workers, family, friends etc.

My answer was No, an emphatic NO!  I could finally breathe again. I stopped scolding myself if the laundry wasn’t done, or the ironing wasn’t finished. I didn’t stop doing my best but I did give myself permission to take a step back and not feel the necessity to be perfect and to get everything done all the time. What I didn’t accomplish today, I could do tomorrow.

So it’s OK to do what’s important and end your day feeling as though you’ve done your best and feel good about yourself. It’s also OK if you take a day off now and then to recharge your batteries without feeling a sense of guilt about what you should be doing. Taking care of you is just as important as taking care of others.

I will say this however, the time management skills I learned during that period still serve me well today. I can get more accomplished in less time, freeing up the time to pursue other interests and enjoy life more.  

“With a new attitude (Newatt2de) and a strong desire to live the life

we’ve always dreamed, we are unstoppable”.

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