Does the thought of success scare you? Do you feel worthy of it?
Those may seem like odd questions but many people are uncomfortable with the prospect of success, and I was no exception. It’s seems hard to believe but it’s true. Who wouldn’t want to be more successful? What is there to be scared of? Why wouldn’t I feel worthy of it?
I don’t think anyone wants to fail, but sometimes we hold back and achieve only partial success because it feels more comfortable than the possibility of something more.
Fear and worthiness go hand in hand. When we don’t feel worthy of something, it’s easy to let the voice of fear in our head guide the decisions we make in life. We hold back, we settle and we stay small, never realising our full potential.
You may not even be aware that the thought of success makes you uncomfortable. If you dig into this a little further though, you might be surprised at what you find. Here are some things that I’ve noticed:
Fear shows up in ways you wouldn’t expect.
The fear of success can manifest itself in different ways. Procrastination, self-sabotage, and an inability to concentrate on important tasks are signs of discomfort with success. Do you suddenly feel tired when performing a task that could take your career to the next level? Do you insist on making everything a struggle and think struggling is the only way you can get what you want in life? These are signs that your subconscious is putting you off and you probably have some fear around becoming successful.
Success can appear more complex than failure. It’s can seem easier to deal with your life as it is than to become successful. The more successful you become, the more visible you become. You may feel like your more exposed to criticism, have more responsibility & have to live with more pressure. Or you might worry you have to become a different person (and this isn’t a bad thing). Yes, success does require change but it doesn’t mean it’s all bad! It gives you a chance to grow and become the person you know you can bebut are afraid to let shine.
Fear and worthiness are like two peas in a pod.
Life is meant to be enjoyed and if you are struggling with what you are doing, you are probably doing it wrong. I don’t mean that everything in life will come with no difficulty. What I mean is that if you are going after something and you are working so hard, banging your head against a brick wall, it might do some good to take a step back and try a new approach.
One of the biggest tools that helped me was to use “I am worthy” statements. They are really easy to do, I write out or say in my head “I am worthy of___” whatever it is that I want in my life. It’s made a profound change in my life, and if you struggle with this I suggest giving it a try. It can help soften your beliefs around your fear of success, worthiness and help you get what you really want in life.
Change your negative beliefs.
A really useful trick I’ve found to start changing my negative thoughts is to question them. It’s quite shocking when you realise that what you are believing may not actually be true! Think about it for a minute.
We spend so much of our time in our own thoughts and assume that everyone else sees the world the way we do. But you know what? They don’t! Abraham Hicks taught me a few things about beliefs that I think might help you:
A belief is only a thought I keep thinking.
A belief is only a thought that I continue to think.
A belief is only my habit of thought.
It’s only a practiced thought.
A belief is only a thought that I think a lot.
Isn’t it a relief that just because you believe something doesn’t mean it’s true (especially about ourselves) and that you can actually change what you believe. A great way to start changing your beliefs around success is make a list of your negative beliefs and why you aren’t as successful as you’d like to be. Try starting with the excuses you make for why you think you can’t have what you want, why you think you aren’t where you want to be, or what you think is standing in your way. (usually the only thing standing in the way is you!) Ask yourself these types of questions:
How do I know this belief is true?
Where did this belief originate?
Could I be wrong?
Am I willing to be wrong?
What are a few counter examples to this belief?
What is this belief costing me?
As you think about these questions, you can write them down.You might find what you believe to be true isn’t actually true after all!
Have a vision of success that excites you.
What does success look like for you? Not what you think it “should” look like or what others say it should be, but what does it really look and feel like for you? What would make you happy? Take some time to consider this, if you have a journal, write this out there or simply think about what it looks like for you. Make a list that excites you and gets you motivated!
Are you afraid that massive success will result in less free time? Build a vision of successthat allows you to work on the beach (or wherever you like) for a few hours each day, take time off, live an unhurried life. Success won’t happen if your vision of success doesn’t excite you.
What are the advantages of success for you? Consider all the advantages that success can bring: happiness, time freedom, money, social status, comfort, contribution, and so on. The sky is the limit here so don’t be afraid to dream big!
Enjoy the process.
Fear and unworthiness may have been getting in the way of your success, but you absolutely have the power to change that. Identifying where it shows up in your life and questioning your own beliefs will help you get past your current blocks so you can design and live a life you love.
Success can seem like a lot of work. If you view the work as something you don’t like, no success will be attractive enough to motivate you. It may feel counterintuitive that anyone would fear success, but this is one of the primary reasons everyone isn’t more successful. Don’t underestimate how much your negative impressions of success can sabotage your future. Build a vision of success that motivates you to be successful. Get rid of the negativity. Question your current beliefs. And enjoy the success you deserve!
Do you feel worthy of success? Leave a comment and let me know, you may help other readers who are struggling with this too!