I was listening to an episode of my favourite podcast today.
My favourite author was answering to a listener's question- "What will you do when you had to do what you don't want to do?"
His answer was so refreshing to me. He just said, "I will say I don't want to do it."
It was a Japanese program and as you probably know that the social pressure is particularly heavy in Japan. I suspect the majority of people are probably putting up with what they don't want to do.
He continues " if everyone is doing what they want to do, that is a happy society. I don't want to do what I don't want to do and I don't force anyone neither. That should be a basic human rights...."
His words might have annoyed some people who have been set in their ways. However, I know his word contains some truth. I learned the same thing from my own bitter experience.
I call it "breakfast in bed incident".
I used to think that bringing breakfast to bed is nice thing a wife can do for a hard working husband. I think I loved the image of me as a good Japanese wife looking after her husband- the funny thing is, I secretly hated doing that. I was resentful I had to get up early for him! It is actually quite funny looking back but I was delivering the breakfast for him in really bad mood and demanded him to thank me!!!
Finally I saw the sense and stopped doing it, giving up the idea of being a perfect wife. Amazingly, he was absolutely fine with it. Of course getting his own breakfast is so much better than breakfast delivered in bad mood.
Now I prepare breakfast only when I want to (which is not very often) and I actually enjoy it.
That is the way it should be. People are happier and so much more productive when they are doing what they love doing.
We have to learn to say No and discover our big Yes.
You may find a hint from the video below. Join the revolution!