One of the most common fears in life is how other people perceive us. We place such a huge emphasis on that, when we make a definite decision to become open and vulnerable, and expose our authentic self, we will discover a life full of energy and easiness and will wonder why we ever locked ourselves in that mental prison.
Become Open and Vulnerable - Build Self Confidence
I was about 16 years old when I began to have a huge issue with my self-consciousness. I'm not sure where it all came from, Its a long time ago now, I can't even remember how I used to feel before that. I have let it rule my life up until recently, to the point where I would not partake in things I wanted to do, and had developed this elaborate false persona that would afford me alibis of not acting in the world in a way that was true to me.
But why did I let myself feel like that, and act like that? You see in my mind I had an idea of what it meant to be a respected young guy and I wanted that. And unfortunately being shy and anxious was not a part of that ideal persona. I wanted to be perceived as the alpha male, strong, ladies' man and a bit of a rascal...hehe I know I was young and naive.
And that's all it is, we develop a perception throughout our young life of what we want our life to look like, based on the impressions we have had up until this point in our lives, from our social circles, family, the media, and we begin to devlop this showcase personality that fits right in the conforms of that model and portray it to the world. Problem is, and I didn't even realise it, it sucks your energy, your passion and for the most part people know instinctively that everything you say and do is coming from this place of inauthenticity. It was always a struggle for me to form and maintain relationships with, well, just about anybody.
You see when we have to constantly act from a place of inauthenticity in the world, our whole life becomes a stage, and keeping up with that is a mental struggle. When what we are thinking is not aligned with what we are saying and doing, for anybody who has done or is doing that, man it is exhausting.
It's hard to imagine, when we have such a strong identification with this personality we have created, that breaking out from that and speaking and acting authentically from within can bring us what it is we have wanted all along.
Becoming Open and Vulnerable
You see when we are open and honest with others and ourselves, we can effortlessly communicate with people, there is no tiring struggle to transition every thought into our ideal persona we are portraying, our energy and enthusiasm for life takes on a new dimension, something that seemed as though it was not possible before.
People are immediately receptive, if we become open and vulnerable, then others will do the same, the world is just one giant mirror that reflects back exactly what we give out. I've heard that saying before somewhere, but now it resonates. Conversations flow effortlessly when coming from within, if everything is manipulated by the mind before coming out there will always be this struggle.
And if we become open, honest and vulnerable from the outset, in any avenue in life, then how can we ever have a fear of what others will think of us? This is who I am and this is how I am.
Of course, in life we can never please everybody. In trying to do so we end up manipulating our personalities to suit the situation and at the same time ingrain a deeper habit of fearing what others may think. For the most part, it's not about them anyway, it's the same with 99% of fear, it's something that's been allowed to develop in our own mind. And at the end of the day, those who will resonate with me will stick around, and others who don't will move on...It's a good thing and the sure fire way to attract the people into your life that you want.
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