Have you heard the saying " If you could only see yourself as others see you? "
Ask yourself the question of, what do others see when they see me.
My answer to that. For people to see me as congruent, what was going on for me on the inside, was the same, as people saw on the outside. When I dug deeper within myself I came to the realization that what I was portraying was my humility as a human being it was a very important value for me.
Jean Austin's Theory of Humility in organization Leadership references below,
( Owens and Hekman 2012 ) Tangey(2002) describes humility as a rich multi-faceted construct that is simplified by an accurate assessment of one's characteristics an ability to acknowledge limitations, and a forgetting of the self.
Tangey(2000,2002) suggests that humility also involves,
. An accurate sense of one,s abilities and achievements
.The ability to acknowledge one,s mistakes, imperfections, gaps in knowledge, and limitations (often with reference to a higher power).
. openness to new ideas, contradicting information and advice.
. An ability to keep one's abilities and accomplishments in perspective.
In substantial agreement with Tangey, Exline and Geyer (2004) suggest that humility involves a " nondefensive willingness to see the self accurately, including strengths and limitations".
Having studied martial arts from an early age, I believe without knowing it at the time, learning the discipline and mindset of knowing that you would fail, more often than you would succeed, knowing the more you practised the nearer you would get to what you were after, gave me a down to earth perspective, on my success, and failures, and a real appreciation and willingness, to learn from others, to be open to others Knowledge, and ways of doing and being.
What this gave me was an appreciation of all my fellow students, their gifts and talents. There's nothing more humbling when you're fighting and no matter what you do, you cant overcome your opponent because of their superior skill, everyone in that dojo had a collective purpose to improve themselves and help improve the people around them, because everyone knew, you're only as good as the quality of people you train with, and I believe that is so true in all areas of Life. In martial arts, we like to become comfortable in very uncomfortable positions or situations, as we know that is where the real growth comes from. Having this type of humility, I believe, is essential and necessary for survival and success, regardless of the tradition or the culture.