How to Close Vicious Cycles: The Three Phases Rule

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“I always choose the wrong boyfriend!”, or in the office “I always make this mistake with colleagues, or the boss”, or “The discussion with my husband always ends the same way”... Sounds familiar? 

It is as if we deliberately choose to hurt ourselves, knowing full well how it will end. And yet, it is more potent than us: we are trapped in a mental loop that always pushes us in the same direction.

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