The 3 core fears we humans have, are fear of not being good enough, not being lovable and not being safe. Every story is unique yet at the core of the negative emotions we find these beliefs, that is why it´s good to clear them. Here are some tips that will unconsciously and consciously help you clear those fears or at least tone them down a bit.
1. The Start Of Your Day:
When you start with a meditation you are telling your subconscious mind several things; one, that you care about yourself because you deserve to be loved. You are safe because a meditation relaxes you and lowers your cortisol levels and of course you feel you are good enough when you can take time to take care of yourself. Some times people need a bit more time or practice to feel comfortable and guilt-free for meditating. The more you do it (10-15min a day is good enough), the easier it will get.
2. The End Of Your Day:
Acknowledge and celebrate all the things you did good, all of that day´s achievements.
Maybe you felt you were the best mum or a great friend. Sometimes we can feel so proud of ourselves because we set boundaries. If you worked on your business and did all of the things in your to-do-list that you were meaning to do congratulate yourself.
By doing this we are letting ourselves know, consciously and unconsciously, that we are good enough. Every day we can find things we did good, sometimes it´s a big list, sometimes 3 things but there is always something. Be proud of who you are.
3. Forgive Yourself:
So many times, we have been too hard on ourselves. When someone you love makes a mistake and apologizes, do you forgive them? If you follow me, I am sure that sometimes you even tell them something like “oh, forget it, it was just an accident” and then you forget about it. You can do the same with yourself.
I do understand that we humans tend to have this annoying voice in our head that can say stupid, annoying, ugly things and also that voice tends to criticize us.
What I personally do, is that whenever I see that this is starting (usually when I am cooking or cleaning the house), I look for an inspirational video that last for one hour or half an hour and allow myself to grow and feel motivated instead of feeling like crap if I listen to the critic in my head.
If you mix that with making a list of 7 things where you probably made mistakes (or simply things you didn´t like), but you forgive yourself for that, then it gets super powerful. Let me share some examples:
I forgive you for; not having set boundaries for so long.
I forgive you for having had so many seizures in the past that scared your kids for many years until they got used to them.
I forgive you for having had an ego so big that it made you have unnecessary arguments with your husband.
I forgive you for not following your schedule perfectly every day…
I promise it will make you cry, but eventually, after some time of reading your list out loud, you will realize that suddenly you stop feeling triggered and you managed to forgive yourself. So, you just find another thing and keep forgiving yourself.
4. Surround Yourself with Positive People:
Angry people are going to be angry, sad people will try to make you sad and hurt people will hurt you. They simply want to have company. Humans instinctively look for a community, a tribe, so look for the positive people and connect with them.
Positive people will be happy for your successes and will encourage you to grow. You will receive good advice and basically, you will feel good about yourself when you are with them.
5. Go With A Life Coach:
There are some fears that need more support or help from a professional. Life coaches go where the root of your fears are and help you let go of them. Finally, you can be free from them and feel a lot lighter and happier.
It is important to mention that as the emotional beings that we are, we will feel negative emotions again. The difference is that we will keep the learnings, and the emotions will be processed in a way that they can flow and go instead of being stored in our bodies.
We give maintenance to our cars, our house, our bodies, and our minds and emotions also need attention and nurturing.
We deserve to be happy and we are already good enough. It´s just that sometimes it is important that we do certain things to keep our minds focused on the right direction.
When we create our online business and start exposing ourselves by doing the work required to succeed, we will feel challenged. It is imperative that we pay close attention to our mindset, values and keep moving forward. In the end, it is in taking action where we completely overcome fears.
I hope you liked this blog and if you have any questions, comments, insights or simply something you would like to share, I am all ears.
To your success;